missfrifri

I’m writing this on the to Petersborough, on my way to meeting The Parents, feeling slightly nauseous. After a couple of hours of outfit- panic I ended up with a compromise- outfit consisting of a pencil skirt and a casual shirt, however I still feel like I need to keep something Swedish so secretly wear a lace body underneath. Everyone should be happy. Also, I feel like my red headband should fool most.

See, when meeting The Parents- or really, when meeting The Mother, there are so many things that must be taken into account. So many ways that you can already be screwed even before, during or after the meeting. As a Swede I tend to be at least a little bit screwed beforehand with any mum, since Swedish women aren’t exactly associated with nuns. Apart from things that you may or may not be in control of yourself, there are also tons of other factors that can determine your fate, such as:

-          Is your man the only child?

-          Is your man the only son?

-          Is your man not the only son, but the other son is gay?

-          Is your man a mummy’s boy?

From experience I know that these are all critical factors.

If you as a girlfriend don’t get along with his mum the consequences will be severe. Also this I have experienced first- hand: the classic example is someone who I used to call “voodoo- mum”, who tricked me into eating some sort of Vietnamese potato that works as a laxative and then gave me a bracelet which was extremely likely to be cursed (considering everything that happened after I put it on). From friends’ experiences, I know of mothers who can make any girl cry if she buys the “wrong” chocolate cake for her “beloved son’s birthday” or buys the "wrong" curtains for his flat. Some mothers simply ignore you altogether, hoping to ride through the storm until the son finds a new girlfriend. The complete opposite of this however, is the stalker- mum who’ll call you 24/7 to go shopping underwear for her son. (Yes, it really does happen. It usually stops if you suggest that you buy him a man- thong.)

Wish me luck! =D

Jaja Blair Waldorf, your headband fools no one...